I know many people have written on this topic before... but I was reminded of it tonight and thought it would be good for me to write down my thoughts :)
I'm often a perfectionist (although not as much as I used to be), and I struggle with desiring perfection out of my child, as many moms do. I want my kid to be the one that is smart, well-behaved, and cute... mostly, just for my sake. Because it reflects good on me.
One thing that I've always loved about Sophie is that she does well with other people, and she does well in nursery/child care/babysitter type situations. I think quite a bit of this is a result of the way she spent the first year of her life. Since Ben and I were in Bible school, she would go to child care every morning. She got used to being with other adults and other babies and other environments, and she adapts well because of it. It's SO nice when I take her to the nursery at church that she loves it, and I can expect that I will be able to spend the next 3 hours in church without getting buzzed because she'll be fine and happy and content in the nursery.
Tonight we went to small group, and she was playing upstairs with the other little kids and a girl who was watching them. She was so excited when she first saw the playroom. And hour later, I heard her crying. I went up, and she would NOT let me set her down after that without freaking out. My first reaction was frustration. She's never like that, and I couldn't understand why she was being such a pain. Why wasn't she just loving it and being happy and proving how good of a child she was in other environments?
But God was kind and reminded me that since this WASN'T the norm, maybe she just needed me. She's had a runny nose for a few days, and she took a really good nap this afternoon- I suppose she probably might not feel completely up to par, and since it was close to bedtime, she just needed mommy.
And I was reminded to love these moments. Rather than be frustrated, LOVE this moment where she wants me and wants to cuddle and doesn't want anyone else. Accept that she's still young and sometimes she just needs mommy (or daddy) and no one else will do.
And so, we cuddled :) And then, she and daddy cuddled :) And it was a good night, even if we missed part of small group.